In a Slump

You're in a slump?

Yep, once every couple months I go up and down, and a couple days ago I was very down.

What was wrong?

Basically short term money stress, something 99.5% of you can understand.  Because even rich people get money stress sometimes.

I can't figure out how to get money in the short term in a way that makes me not hate my life..  Currently I'm in the UAE and there's not much here I can do.  

Can you do freelance artwork?  

I wish I could.. the second reason I'm in a slump.. is that people don't like my art very much.  I don't know why exactly but people just don't.  I've thought long and hard about it and it comes down to two things.  

The obvious one is the lack of technical skill, I'm still amateur.  But if you look at Deviantart there are thousands of examples of amateur pictures being very appreciated.  

The second thing, as my girlfriend pointed out, my pictures aren't special.  There's nothing really interesting or mysterious or thoughtful about them.  I don't really try to put a message into the pictures.  They're just pretty and empty.

Thinking about this caused me to go into a pretty severe two day laying on the bed coaxing myself to exist depression.

The problem is.. I don't have a message.. 

The reason for that is.. I don't value communication about serious issues.. things that are important to me.  

Why is that?  

I once read a quote that impacted me quite a lot.. It goes something like "between two equally learned men, conversation has no purpose."

That idea, combined with the experience that trying to change someone else's mind about something is a bad way to communicate, leaves me with: learning something from others, and joking around, as my two main attitudes.

Which is fine, I get along fine with most people and I enjoy their company.  Except now that I'm trying to make art that people like, and failing, I'm forced to examine both my art and myself deeply.

What will you do now?

Two things.  I'm going to try to develop a painterly feeling art style and improve my background skill to try to get some freelance work.  Anime style isn't in very high demand.

I'm also going to try to put more value on communication.  Putting myself out there, opening myself up to let others try to change my mind, learn more about them, try to foster a lifestyle of connectedness.  Having a desire to communicate is probably the basis of putting some feeling or emotion or message into an artwork that people can feel attraction to.

Is art more important than your game?

Let's say they're equally important.  I've got to be realistic and say that since there are 300 new games coming out on Android per day, mine is unlikely to make any money.  Unfortunately things come back to money in the end, way too often.  If I had some kind of fan base who liked my art, they'd be interested in playing my game.  Which brings us back to square one..

How's the art coming?

It's good, there are more collections of resources on Youtube now than ever before. 

 https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtqLEajb5DORGv4qXWzVSmA

This is a wicked cool collection of Chinese painters, they're getting me all inspired.

Hopefully after a few days of painting I'll be feeling ready to tackle the attack animation.  I've struggled with backgrounds for so long I'm really hoping to get the hang of them..

Let's see what we churn out!

Walking Animation

How was your trip?

Awesome!  Istanbul and Amsterdam were both well worth visiting.  People around the world are very kind.  They are also a bit pushy and will definitely try to help you part with your money.  Also.. man.. Istanbul has a lot of refugees from Syria.. They'll ask you for money too, and I urge you to give as much as you can.  

Watch out for the experienced swindlers though.. that money would have made me happier if it went to the kids or musicians playing on the grand strip.

What's up for today?

Well the walking animation is passable by itself, needs a little more work, but we really need to see it side by side in the game and judge how it matches the resting animation.  I'm very worried that the perspective is too different between them and it will look awkward.

Great let's throw it in and see!

Yep that's the idea but it's been so long since I added an animation I can't remember what all the steps are..  And, lo and behold, there are no comments in the code.. I was saving that for the great refactoring which.. I assume will still be great when it happens.

Well after just a little bit of mucking around, we've got it in the game!  Here's the little update:

Next we'll work on the attack animation!  I'll be making a Youtube tutorial video out of that one.  It will be long and arduous.  We'll get there though!